Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Infant CPR Class

So last night we trekked off to Infant CPR, hoping that by going we would never have to actually use it on our babies (kind of like how in elementary school if you did your homework you got a snow day but if you didn't do it, counting on said snow day, it'd be sunny and bright the next day).

We were each bestowed with a blow-up baby to practice on and take home, in case we wanted to practice more or train family members. It's a super creepy baby.

Creepy doll.
The nurse kind of rambled but got the point across that it's 30 chest compressions, lift the chin to open the airway, and then two breaths.

This is where it got tricky. Blue did this all just fine. I, on the other hand, am not the one you want performing CPR on your baby. The chest compressions really hurt my poor arthritic fingers (you have to push HARD). I aced lifting the chin, but when it came time to give two breaths, I failed. You see, you are supposed to cover both the baby's mouth and nose with your mouth. This works fine for adults with normal-sized mouths.

I am not one of them. Dentists often use child-sized tools to fit in my tiny mouth. I particularly love when they tell me to open wide and I mumble back that I am, and then they try to shove both hands in there anyways. Not. Happening. I should have had several teeth pulled before getting braces because of my small mouth but did not, leading to a slew of dental troubles down the line (I still curse my orthodontist who did not pull teeth).

So my attempts to cover both mouth and nose were pathetic. I flung the doll back at Blue and declared that he would be in charge of the breathing part if it ever came to it. Again, here's hoping we'll never need it.

Next we moved on to baby Heimlich, otherwise known as "the one time it's okay to beat your infant." You can't do the real Heimlich on them, as their muscles aren't developed enough to protect their organs. So you turn them over and whack them on the upper back a few times, then give a few breaths. I got the whacking part down, but again, had to turn over Creepy Baby to Blue for the breaths. Epic fail, Mommy.

When we got home I decided to put Creepy Baby and Diapered Teddy next to each other.

Girl: Look, Dad. There's a bear.
Father : No, Christine, that's a frog. Bears wear hats.
Wish I had a hat for the bear... they remind me of this scene from the Great Muppet Caper:

So now we have a set of twins, identical or not, for the cats to investigate.

In other news my doctor's appointment went well, I'm holding steady at 3.4cm and no pre-term labor. Both babies were moving a lot so no photos from this ultrasound. And it's been confirmed that Baby B is on the left (trying to break my ribs) and Baby A is on my right and is the one I feel moving at all hours of the day.


  1. my mother is a CPR instructor, so has some of those dummies in the basement. My niece found the baby dummy and insisted my mother put a diaper and some clothes on it.